=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K. = =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= How Does Everyone Else Do It? ----------------------------- Part I in the upcoming series Tick, tick, tick, tick. All I can hear is the internals of my wristwatch and the low murmur of the ceiling fan in my two bedroom apartment. It's so quiet, I'm in the country and not a Taco Bell within 30 miles of here, yet cows within walking distance. I look out my window into a clear starry night, a car passes by on a nearby road. I can hear the stones crunching under it's tires and I try to imagine what it would be like to be the person in the car, to have his life, to be right there in his reality. I'm confused, dismayed and disillusioned by my life at it's current stage. I'm a student, a professional, an introvert, a friend and a lover. I'm poor, yet I'm better off than most, and I'm broke but I'm salaried. When did life become so complicated? Was it not just the other day when I was a junior in high school, living at home, working 9-5 a some slave labor job and actually loving life? I can't help but think about my teen years every day, contemplating what I would give some satanic being to take me back there. Most times I find myself contemplating the worth of my soul or some essential appendage. Why do I yearn for those days when I was just a kid and thought I knew it all? The days when all was trivial and nothing was permanent. Today, I am jealous of those students at my college that go to parties, get drunk and seem to not have a care in the world. How do they do it? I have bills, rent, car payments and insurance. I'm broke most of the time, despite working at a very large corporation and making quite a bit more than most people I know. Yet, I want their lives. I want to be a party guy, I want to get drunk and stupid. I want to act juvenile and have others around me just blow it off because I am a college student. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to be Bluto from Faber Univ. but I want to have fun. The only problem is, I can't let go of responsibility. I am always worried or thinking about something. Did I pay this bill? Did I get this done for work? Did I do my homework? Did I study enough for the test coming up? Is my girlfriend happy? Like a broken Hank Williams 45, these things cycle through my mind. How do they do it? While my tuition is being subsidized by outside sources and scholarships, I know most of these students are funded primarily by their parents. No bills, no jobs, no responsibilities other than school. They go to classes, perhaps work a part-time job to get some spending money and THATS IT. While it sounds enticing, and I think I'd like to live like that for a year or so, I can only wonder what these poor souls are going to do when they get to my stage of life. I've learned a lot of valuable lessons in my 20-something years on this earth, and due to my choice of lifestyle, learned it quicker than most college students. Yet I envy the four years of parties, drunken sex, elicit drugs and vomiting. This semester I've scheduled myself for 40 hours of work a week plus 18 credit hours. This should make me forget all about fun and parties. Welcome to my Dante's Inferno. Tersian Life Masochist =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Questions, Comments, Bitches, Ideas, Rants, Death Threats, Submissions = = Mail: jericho@dimensional.com (Mail is welcomed) = =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = To receive new issues through mail, mail jericho@dimensional.com with = = "subscribe fuck". If you do not have FTP access and would like back = = issues, send a list of any missing issues and they will be mailed. = =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = AnonFTP FTP.DIMENSIONAL.COM/users/jericho/FUCK = = FTP.SEKURITY.ORG/pub/zines/fucked.up.college.kids = = FTP.GIGA.OR.AT/pub/hackers/zines/FUCK = = FTP.ETEXT.ORG/pub/Zines/FUCK = = WWW http://www.dimensional.com/~jericho = = http://www.reps.net/~krypt/fuck.html = = http://www.interlog.com/~lisa/f.u.c.k. = =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = (c) Copyright. All files copyright by the original author. = =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=